Reality Comes to Ottawa

Speaking of Revolutionary New Dating Paradigms, the other day someone told me about “like, the totally raddest reality show ever” –- Rock of Love. (seen on something called “VH1”) In this brilliant social experiment, washed-up rockers like Brett Michaels, who have a hard time finding a meaningful relationship, search for love by:

Inviting twenty handpicked beautiful women to move into his rock and roll palace in the Hollywood Hills to compete for his heart. They must win over his mind and his body by proving their love for Bret, their passion for rock and their potential to be the perfect “Rock Star Girlfriend.” During the course of the show, “women” need to prove they can:

– Attend red carpet events
– Live on a tour bus with roadies
– Compete with younger, hotter groupies
– Be cool around celebrities
– Get “down and dirty” with him
– Always look smokin’ hot.

As I was looking this up, I came across something even more unbelievable. As you know, Canada likes to pick up American reality show successes and make them their own (e.g.: Canadian Idol, Eh? So You Think You Can Dance Canada, Eh? The Next/First Great Prime Minister). Our version of Rock of Love, apparently is going to be something called Hill of Love.

As far as I can figure out it’s going to be on CBC and feature a series of has-been/never-been MPs who are trying to find their soul-mates by inviting groups of 20 beautiful Canadian political science students to Parliament Hill for a month.

In the first season, Ottawa-Orleans MP, Royal Galipeau, will ask women to prove they’d be well-suited to be the Deputy Speaker’s “Hill-Babe” in the fast-paced world of Canadian politics. Competitors will need to show they can:

– Sit with him in the House and nudge him awake as required
– Travel back and forth from Orleans to Parliament Hill several times a year
– Compete mano-a-mano with David McGinty next time he picks a fight
– Be cool when accidently, on-purpose brushing up against Stephen Harper in the hallway
– Get down on their knees regularly and pray with him to rid Canada of all the perverts and baby-killers
– Always look like a proper, god-fearin’ woman in public and act like a randy she-bitch in the bedroom.