Dear Entitlement Person…

  • When I’m walking through a door ahead of you, arms loaded with bags, and I’m kind enough not to let the door swing in your face and hold it with my elbows for you to grab, please don’t just slip by me without so much as a thanks, leaving me standing there looking stupid.
  • When I stand aside to let people on the bus first who may be slower because they’re older, pregnant, pushing walkers or strollers, please understand that this does not mean you’re allowed to shove your way ahead of them all.
  • When you’re in a long line behind me at the grocery store and a new cashier opens up, she’s not opening just for you, but rather for the person who’s been waiting in the long line the longest.
  • When you’re having a loud, spicy discussion on your cell phone in a public place, don’t give me a dirty look if I make a face or a sound that indicates I’ve overheard your conversation. I just assumed you intended the chatter for everyone’s entertainment.
  • When you’re out enjoying a bike ride and decide to race at top speeds on the sidewalk, please ring your bell or shout before knocking me over as you go by.
  • When you’re in your big, shiny car at an intersection, please take note of the white lines spaced about 5 feet apart.  They are not for you to park in while waiting for the light to change. They’re for me to walk in so I don’t have to stroll out in the middle of traffic.
  • When you see someone of advanced years, whether they’re your customer or passenger or just someone in the same public space as you, please don’t automatically treat them with impatience, mockery or anger.  They’re human beings just like you except they happen to be older and you happen to be a rude little shit.

Thank-you.  That’s all for now.

18 responses to “Dear Entitlement Person…

  1. Oooh, this kind of behavior is one of my biggest pet peeves.

    One day, I was waiting for an elevator without about seven other people. When the door finally opened, a guy burst through the crowd from somewhere behind and charged right into the elevator before us. What did he think we were standing there for? Just watching the pretty lights as the elevator descended floor by floor?

  2. In your hurry to chastise the rude little shits you missed my pet peevers. The ones who decide to carry on a conversation with their friends in the most disruptive place. Entrance or exit to a store, escalator etc. right in the middle so no one can come or go. They always look very shocked when I knock them over.

  3. amen. I’ve taken to commenting on people’s cell convos and I’m personally having a great time. Others don’t really like it, but I just smile as though the talker and I are sharing a private joke about the person on the other end of the call. “Did she really say that? OMG!”

  4. Hunter- Great, all posts are available for publication and distribution as long as I get credit and/or royalties as applicable.

    Debra – Oh ya, the elevator entitlement person. I guess ya’ll weren’t escaping fast enough for him.

    Bandobras – middle of the grocery store aisle, middle of the sidewalk so you can’t get by. I’m not big enough to knock people over, alas.

    DoR – I’ve been sooo tempted to do that, especially when people are agonizing with someone about one of their stupid relationships and the guy they’re talking about is obviously an asshole, but they “luuurve” him soooo much.

    Violetsky- We can’t have all the normal people hiding out and leaving the world in the hands of the dickheads!

    Jacki – That would be such fun. So far I just snort or do a pfft or shake my head. Once I laughed and the talker looked at me and said, “do you mind?” all huffy.

    Jazz – I could use a long long twin in my life. Let’s do brunch sometime and compare adoption stories.

  5. I’ve been feeling alot like this lately. Like everything bothers me. What’s wrong with people!

  6. And if I slow down while driving, or actually bring my car to a stop to let you in ahead of me from a side street or a driveway, would it kill ya to give me a wave to say thanks?

  7. Can we add to the list:

    -public spitting (I try to always say “that’s gross!” if I don’t feel my safety is a concern)

    -when you are waiting to cross the street and there is one car coming and instead of just going by (not stop sign, no crosswalk) they stop for you, when if they had just gone in the first place, since they had the right of way, you could take your time instead of feeling rushed

    -when people open the door for you but you are still super far away so you feel like you need to jog over. How about I keep walking and I open the door myself?

    Ok these aren’t entitlement things, just things that bug me…

  8. A&J – I can’t wait to get old and eccentric so I can just shout at people and give ’em old lady heck whenever I feel like it!

    Alison – Entitlement drivers don’t need to thank anyone. It is their right to have everyone make way for them.

    Tiana – Oh ya – the world is your spitoon. And in the winter it freezes and people slip and fall on it. Ewwwww. The other 2 things are iffy since people are trying to do the nice, polite thing, it’s hard to discourage them even though they’re being a bit overly-enthusiastic about it. Don’t go to Halifax if you don’t like the car thing. Cars will screech to a halt in the middle of a highway if they think you look like you might be thinking about crossing the street.

  9. Amen on the Halifax street-crossing thing. I’ve had friends from Southern Ontario visit me there, who went home to their firends exclaiming, “They stop for you when you want to cross the street there!” as if they had found the true Mecca.
    When I did radio in Halifax, I used to call Spring Garden Road, “owned and operated by pedestrians.”
    Surprised you wouldn’t like that treatment, Zoop.

    My list of things which annoy me is far too long to list here. Yours is a good start, but a drop in the bucket. I could do a whole chapter on phone etiquette, for one. Like, does anyone – people, businesses, doctor’s offices, etc. – return friggin’ phone calls anymore?

  10. JB – No one even answers their phone anymore, let along return calls. The Halifax street crossing thing just got annoying after a while because cars would stop even when you weren’t crossing the street just because you happened to pause on the sidewalk. Also it gave people a false sense of entitlement because they expected to be able to just dash across the street whenever they felt like it and not every single driver out there was an alert uber-polite Halifax driver which ends up causing pedestrian injuries and fatalities.

  11. Maybe you just give off such intense body language when you walk, that good, God-fearing polite Halifax people stop their cars in their tracks for fear of offending or even negatively affecting your forward motion.

    Maybe you could try walking backwards.

    It’s so disheartening for me to have to accept that – after all these years of thinking that I come from a place where chivalry is not dead – that my fellow Halifax brothers and sisters have been just trying to lull Ontarians into a false sense of security so that the bastards on the road who don’t stop could kill them. I don’t know how I couldn’t have figured that out for myself.

  12. JB – Did I say they did it deliberately? Sheesh. I was gobsmacked when I first came to Halifax and people opened doors for each other and young men gave us seats on buses for older people (not me, of course, because I appear so sprightly), cars politely give way to pedestrians, people talked to you on the street that weren’t completely crazy. Really, I appreciated it all. I just noticed that pedestrians took advantage of car drivers and it wasn’t good.

  13. I’m onboard with the collective bitching about people not answering phones or returning calls. Let me add to that: Communicating only by email. If capital punishment was legal in this country, my boss would have been given the chair years ago. He sits in his office, communicating via email to people out in the newsroom, no more than 30 feet away. Even a phone call over that distance would be better. Several times, I have refused to participate, and replied to his email only to indicate that I would only continue to address the issue at hand, if he chose to TALK to me about it.
    He’s the same boss who “gifted” each of our producers with Crackberrys for Christmas, and had the gall at a producers meeting (which are rare) to suggest we try not replying to emails one day a week, and either phone the person on the other end of the email if they’re outside of our building, or walk over to that person’s desk, if he or she is in our building. We laughed uproariously, and started calling him Kramer, because he’d be the first one to declare “I’M OUT!” He was not impressed.

  14. Bob – it’s all about accountability. Emails allow for a nice electronic trail, so no one can claim they weren’t told about something or that they never said such-and-such. At least that’s why we are instructed to use emails for everything. And by the way, BOB – when was the last time you spoke to me in person or on the phone? Ah, NEVER. I see…