A Letter to ELW

Dear Extra Long Weekend,

You can’t possibly know how excited I am for your arrival tomorrow. I’ve been looking forward to this for so very long. You just don’t come around often enough, my love. Once every month or so just makes me crazy with desire for you. It’s not enough to  satisfy the insatiable hunger I have for you. I need you – crave you – constantly.

Oh, ELW! I love you so. I love you so much it’s almost unbearable.

When I sit at work anticipating you, I tingle. Literally, tingle with excitement. I can’t focus on my very important government job because I think only of you and the things we will do to each other – the things we will do together. I think of lazing in bed with you in the mornings. I think of your extra long, glorious days stretching out before me. I think of indulging in things with you that I would never think about doing with ordinary weekends.

Ordinary weekends bore me. They are so pedestrian; so dull; so lacklustre.  I can never relax and enjoy them the way I always enjoy you, ELW.

You complete me.

How I long to be with you all the time. How I wish there were no other days but you in my life, my gorgeous, beautiful extra-long lover. How I hate those horrid, brutal workdays;  those insipid regular weekends. My god! How I yearn for the time when my life will consist of nothing but you, ELW. And then — and then we will be inseparable. Together forever; free to explore each other with wild abandon.

But for now– my darling, my heart-and-soul– for now we will have to make do with the stolen moments.  Those sweet, but all too infrequent intervals. We will make the most of them though, won’t we, ELW? Oh yes, we will. We always do.

Already I can feel you beckoning me into your soft caresses; enveloping me in your extra-long, languid hours. I love your extra-longness so, so much. It fills me up with its smoldering passion. It leaves me weak and spent and weepy when it’s over. Oh yes!

Oh ELW! Soon — I will be with you soon, my extra-long, extra-precious love. With excruciating longing, I remain —

Yours always,

XUP

PS: A VERY HAPPY CANADA DAY TO ONE AND ALL. I hope you all get to enjoy an Extra- Long Weekend of your very own! Seriously, is anyone going to work on Friday? OC Transpo is going on “special reduced service” like they did the weeks before Christmas because they figure no one needs to get around on days that are sort of close to a holiday.

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29 responses to “A Letter to ELW

  1. Canada does holidays correct. If the holiday falls on a weekend it moves to the Monday after. However here in Korea it doesn’t. And for the last couple of years more than half of the holidays have been landing on Saturday or Sunday resulting in no extra days off.

    anyhow enjoy the long weekend.

  2. I’m taking Monday and Tuesday off, and turning into an E-E-ELW. Almost a week away, and only using up three days vacation!

    And you can bet I’ll be coming back Tuesday around midnite, to squeeze ever last hour I can, away from the Factory!

    Though perhaps I shouldn’t be too cynical. After all, my new manager has sent us an email, offering us free coffee and cookie/muffin today. (But apparently, just to those that have completed their work!)

    Wow. A free management-motivational-coffee, followed by an E-E-ELW.

    Can life get any better?

  3. My favourite kinds of ELW’s are the ones I create myself, with my holidays.

    Why?

    Because when they are “bestowed” upon us by way of statutory holidays, management (at least where I work) expects you to squeeze 5 days’ work into 4 days (or 3, in the case of this week).

    So while you get an extra day or two, you pay for it, dearly.

    🙂

    If I just take a Friday off, only my immediate boss cares about my work, and I am quite easily able to get my work done in the first couple of days of any typical week.

    Enjoy your ELW heh heh… you’ve earned it.

  4. Geewits – Pardon me, but this is NOT a holiday we made for a US Holiday. This is Canada’s birthday – July 1st. In fact I can’t think of a single holiday we created just because there was already an American holiday at that time. So there. We have our very own holidays…..the very idea…harrumph…

    LGS – Don’t they give you any holidays in Outer Mongolia? The extra-long weekend part is not statutory, I should say. We get Thursday off, but I’ve also take vacation days on Friday and Monday to make it a nice little holiday.

    Sean – If we really wanted to do it correctly, we’d made Friday a stat holiday, too. As it is most people are going to take it as a vacation day anyway. But ya, that would suck having Christmas on a weekend and then having to go right back to work on the Monday. One more thing to look forward to next year, eh?

    Friar – Wah-hOOOO. I’m taking Friday and Monday. I think I might take every Monday this summer since I have a lot of vacation days saved up and no plans for a long summer holiday since the kiddie is working all summer. But that coffee and muffin thing – man, that rocks! And you complain about your workplace!

    Brett – No, I haven’t actually earned it, but I’m going to enjoy it anyway. I find vacations are always like that whether they’re stat or your own. You have an extra pile of work to do before you leave and big new pile when you get back.

  5. i have been lucking out – last week i was off on thursday for st jean baptiste day, and i don’t work on fridays soooo 4 day weekend, and this weekend i get to do it all again. expose me too much to the outside world and i may never come back again!

  6. @Brett

    Sure, when I’m away, sure, the work piles up.

    But when I get back, I’ll just plow through it at my regular pace. Just enough to get my “Fully meets” on my performance review.

    And not one iota more.

    Who knows? Maybe I might qualify for another scrumptious factory-made cafeteria muffin.

  7. Yes, I’m taking Friday off too, AND my kids are at day camp on both Thursday and Friday. I cannot remember when I last had two days to myself. I only feel a little bit guilty, and a lot indulgent. Yay me!

  8. @geetwitz-Yeah, Canada Day (or formerly Dominion Day) celebrates when our country’s provinces were united ( You’re just jealous of our ELW! Hahah!)

  9. I’ll be at work on Friday… at a new job too.

    Oh well at least it’ll be quiet.

    (I shouldn’t complain, I chose to go to work…)

  10. Meanie – I thought if you lived in Ontario and worked in Quebec you didn’t get Jean Baptiste day??

    Friar – I’m keeping my fingers crossed that you make the muffin qualifier.

    Finola – They have day camps on Canada Day? That’s mighty unusual isn’t it? Lucky you.

    Pauline – They’re probably getting an extra long weekend too since July 4th is on a Sunday, I imagine they’ll get Monday off and then a lot of people will take Friday as well. It’s nice when Canada Day is on Friday and July 4th is on the Monday – especially if you live in a border town (as I used to growing up). One big long weekend cross-border party.

    Justin – Awwww…poor Justin…

  11. I don’t know about the rest but after reading that I feel like having a cigarette and then a shower to freshen up and continue the festivities.

  12. Ummm…I don’t know if this is a statement about my lifestyle or how spacey I am right now in moving lala land…but I didn’t even know this was a ELW!

    But thanks for the reminder, the community hall is hosting a strawberry lunch on July 1st!

  13. Here’s to the ELW and a brilliant post! Do you think the Mountie’s wear that underwear beneath the uniforms? Hmmm (Justin – I’d pull the fire alarm. No one should have to work Friday) Happy Canada Day everyone!

  14. LGS – Really? No holidays at all? Do you get weekends off at least?

    Jazz – Every weekend should be long or extra-long. When I’m king of the world that’s how it will be.

    Dave1949 – Funny how you’re the only one who thought there was a bit of a steamy tone to the letter. But you shouldn’t smoke with your sore throat.

    Mudmama – I don’t think it’s necessarily and ELW for everyone, but I think a lot of people will be taking Friday off to make it one.

    MM – No, Mounties don’t wear that underwear under their uniforms. I will tell you how I know that one day.

    Cedar – Was it good for you, too?

    Meanie – What? He said you have to take Friday but you don’t get the stat holiday in August? Is that legal? What union are you with? What if Friday is your usual day off or flex day or something? Then what? I really, really don’t think they can do that. I would check that out with your local rep or something. It just doesn’t even seem possible.

    Alison – Thanks baby. Why settle for regular when you can go extra-long, right? I mean, who wouldn’t take Friday off if they possibly could, right? So that the weekend is extra-long, I mean. Right? Hurray for extra-long!! Weekends.

  15. Woo-hoo!
    ELWs rock more than a Beau’s beer on a hot day!
    More than a great back rub!
    More than a big income tax refund!
    More than a Leaf/Arsenal/Blue Jay victory!
    More than almost anything!!!!
    And to boot – the forecast in this part of the country is positively, awesomely, AWESOME!
    And I almost NEVER use this many exclamation marks!
    Woo-hoo!
    And a Happy Canada Day to you XUP! The RLG and the subunits and I are off to the Hill tomorrow and Montréal on Monday.

  16. I need an extra long weekend. Why do you get so damn many? UNFAIR! Although, I guess I get one, also, on account of the Independence Day and all, but still. STILL. I am going to need more of these. You should share.

  17. This was gr8! 🙂

    Okay, so now… THIS is when I miss working for somebody else. Even when I take a day off now it’s hard to stop thinking about work; there’s always something to do.

    One of my favourite employers was in Mississauga — a book publisher. From the end of May to Labour Day we got off every Friday at noon. Course, we made up for it with a shorter lunch during the week but still, it was worth getting a head start on Fridays. Just those few hours made all the difference.

    Happy Canada Day, eh.

  18. sigh. it has once again come to an end elw. i will shed a tear when you leave me tonight, knowing that i have a full five days of work ahead of me. how will i survive until august when i will get to languish in your longness again.

    adieu.

  19. Trashy – I think you’ve used up your quota of exclamation marks for the year. Whatever will you do when the next ELW comes up in August?

    Linsey – Howdy stranger! I make my own ELWs with vacation days combined with stat holidays. It’s the only way to roll.

    Cedar – I’m happy for you. Bask in the afterglow.

    Davina – That’s like going to university, too. You get holidays but there’s always a paper coming due or some stuff to read so you can never really just relax. It took me at least 6 months after I graduated before I could really relax on weekends without having that voice in the back of my head telling me there was something I should be doing. I have no problem with that anymore. At all.

    Kimberly – Glad you enjoyed it. It was a fabulous ELW!

    Smothermother – Hey! Are you making time with my ELW? I had him yesterday too, so there!!

    Jay – I’m back dearheart. Stop fretting. Sometimes I need a little blogging break, too.