Muscrat Love ***

*** That seems like an innocuous enough title not to attract a lot of pervs.

muscrat

So, the daughter is 16 and suddenly all her friends are sexually active. We’ve been having extra many discussions about this topic lately, as you can imagine. Of course, 16-year-olds having sex isn’t anything new, but kids my child’s age having sex is definitely something new for me.

I won’t get into any specifics regarding my daughter because I don’t think she’d be too happy about having something this personal bandied about in the bloggy world. However, I do think the topic in general is worthy of some bloganalysis.

Despite the threat of deadly and not-so-deadly, but still rather unpleasant STDs, kids just barely into their teens are having sex.  A few of them do it because they’re in a “long-term” (more than a month) relationship and reckon it’s expected. All their friends are doing it.  Or because it’s cool.  Or the do it to get some guy to like them. Or because they’re drunk and don’t know how to avoid it. All of these, while the same reasons many of us started having sex, are really bad reasons.

At 16, the daughter has already waved off one school-mate who left school to go have her baby. She has had huddled discussions with friends about another school-mate who got knocked up and was desperately trying to find a way to have an abortion without her parents finding out. And, she has had one school-mate get date-raped at a party. And, my daughter goes to what is generally considered to be a “good” school. 

From what I’ve heard, seen and remember from my own teenhood, I don’t think most young teens are ready for sex, not to mention all the flotsom and jetsom that goes with it. Most of them aren’t even clear on the physiological aspects of sex, nor are they equipped to deal with the emotional aspects of it. Hell, most adults aren’t equipped to deal with intimate relationships.

Some teenage girls deal with not being ready for sex by providing oral service to boys. This, apparently is not considered to be sex among the younger set. It’s just a way to get boys to like you and/or a way to keep your boyfriend from breaking up with you and dating someone else who will have sex with them.

I find this horrifying. Sure,  I’m all for young people finding creative ways of enjoying each other sexually if they’re not ready to commit to intercourse, but what’s going on here isn’t at all mutual. The girls are not enjoying this – they get nothing out of it but a stained t-shirt and a pat on the head. “It’s no big deal,” the girls say shrugging, while watching wistfully as the guy they’ve just serviced saunters off with his arm around the “real” girlfriend (Who, I understand, often watches and laughs).

Sooner or later most teenagers will fall in love and then things get really tricky. Because, odds are that after a while the couple are going to get to the point of wanting to have sex the old fashioned way — the way their parents and grandparents did it! (And are still doing it) (Ha! That should freak them out). 

I don’t think there is anything, that can be considered healthy, that a parent, or anyone else, can do to stop teenagers having sex if they feel ready to do it. We adults can make sure they know what they’re doing; that they know how to protect themselves physically. And with a lot of dialogue we may even help them to prepare a bit emotionally and make sure they don’t do anything they don’t feel ready for. But that’s it.

All that’s left is for us is to hope that our daughter’s (and son’s) first time[i] and every other time after that is a positive experience and that the relationship is strong and that if, or when, it ends they are not too heartbroken.

And to be there to pick up the pieces if they are.

It’s all so different and yet so much the same as when I was young. Parents weren’t involved at all in our sex lives at all, except to threaten us with death if we came home pregnant and/or got some girl pregnant.

For instance, did you and your parents ever discuss whether or not it would be okay if your girlfriend/boyfriend slept over? It seems to be a normal thing these days.  I guess if my daughter is going to be intimate with a boy, I’d rather she do it somewhere where she feels comfortable and safe. Other parents say there’s no way they could allow that and say that only encourages something I should be trying to discourage. 

Could anybody give me some sort of timeframe as to when this parenting gig starts to get easy?


[i] Say, YA!  all those whose first time was romantically wonderful. Say, ARG! all those whose first time was really bad. Say, MEH! all those whose first time would have been pretty much forgettable if it weren’t for the fact that it was the first time.

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50 responses to “Muscrat Love ***

  1. I’m so glad that DD is now 22, because somehow that makes the whole s-e-x thing easier (as in I don’t care so much any more). If she does it, when she does it just doesn’t matter now the same way it mattered when she was 16. And I wouldn’t ask her anyway at her age. She’s an adult. If she wants to tell or discuss or whatever, I will certainly be as receptive and as informative as I can. That being said, I doubt I’d be okay with her having a sleepover, hypocrite that I am (PG stays over all the time, or else I’m at his place). Not that the situation has come up yet, but I think I might fall back on the old “it’s-my-house-so-I -get-to-do-what-I-want-in-it-and-when-you-move-out-you-can-do-what-you-want-in-yours” position. Oh, and my first time? Meh! But at least I was in love!

  2. I have no children of my own as you know but I have been assured by parents I know older than you that parenting gets easier tomorrow. My sister with the 43 year old daughter 40 year old son and 3 grandchildren told me that just a little while ago.
    ON the other hand you have in fact done a great job with little XUP and you and she will do fine through this too.

  3. I expect you to take really good notes and fill me in on what happens when The Boy gets there. Knowing her mom, your daughter has probably had any number of discussions about self-respect. I think it’s all we can do as parents. Respect yourself, respect other people. Hope and pray there wasn’t eye-rolling and a “MOM, I know, ok?” (does yours do that still?)

    My parents wouldn’t let us sleep together in the same bed when we first moved in together, let alone staying over.

  4. “It’s no big deal,” the girls say shrugging, while watching wistfully as the guy they’ve just serviced saunters off with his arm around the “real” girlfriend (Who, I understand, often watches and laughs).

    Seriously?!

  5. Meh. My first time was utterly worth forgetting.

    As a step-mother who incidentally dislikes children, the thought of one of them coming home knocked up is my greatest nightmare. ‘Cause then they’d want to have it and keep it in the house and I’d… I’d leave. Mr Perfect or not, I ain’t dealing with that.

    Having been a teen myself, and knowing damn well that you can’t change when they decide to start having sex, I knew enough not to even try to dissuade either of them. I did, however, take each aside and in a rare moment of collusion, told them that when they were ready, I’d hook them up with birth control.

    I can’t make them smart, but I can at least make them prepared.

    Oh, and there will be no boys sleeping over in my house.

  6. Arg!
    Look, my girls are both in their forties and I still find it hard. One daughter’s marriage broke up in a quite spectacular way. The other one is on her own and not happy about it.

    I was a teenager in the fifties. My mother was pretty broadminded but I, the rebel, told her nothing. Not hardly ever; the exception being the time my period was a week late and scared me into running a temperature. I was 17. A girl’s only method of birth control was the rhythmn method. Brrr. Let me tell you, teenaged girls did not go and buy condoms in the fifties. No.

    I dispensed information starting at about age 11 (not counting the ‘where do babies come from stage) and always urged the use of contraceptives. Bought them condoms, in fact. One of my girls gave me one scare; at 13 (!) came and told me about being naked in bed with a boy. I admit, I climbed the walls. Hauled her into the doctor and had her checked for STD’s. (I knew the boy.) After that, she mostly left sex alone until she was in university.

    My rule about sleeping over was yes, if long term or committed relationship (defined as living together or engaged), no otherwise.

    Wow, was this ever a good and thought provoking post.

  7. No one ever talked to us about sex with the opposite sex. My aunt was more concerned with making sure we didn’t masturbate in her house, which of course I did as much as my body would let me. Seriously though, you’re not going to stop her from doing it, so make sure she knows how to engage in it safely without getting a disease or getting preggers. I know you hate to hear that but it’s true, she’s going to do it and if you demystify it and make it seem normal and not ‘out there,’ then hopefully it will be something pleasurable and normal for her.

  8. then. And really – you wouldn’t let her have her boyfriend over? Most others here have said the same thing. I’m surprised. If she’s going to be having sex, do I want her doing it in a car, some sleazy motel, a smelly boy’s room/apartment/dorm or in her own comfortable, safe bed where she is in control of her environment? Interesting. Of course, I may have a different opinion when the time comes. We’ll see.

    Bandobras – Tomorrow you say? Same time that it’s going to stop raining? (And thanks)

    Nat – Oh ya, I’ll be an expert in a few years – ha ha. And there is still a certain amount of eye-rolling because it’s expected, but also a lot of listening and questions. Will you let the Boy have his girlfriend sleep over? Would you think less of the girl if her parents let her sleep over at your house?

    Olivia – Yes. Seriously. I don’t know what these girls are thinking to demean themselves that way.

    Zoom – Me, too. Maybe closer to ARG than MEH. Frankly, I’m surprised (but glad) I ever did it again.

    Susan – Funny how that “losing your virginity” thing looms so big in person’s life for so long and then when it happens it’s mostly very anti-climactic, at best. Don’t your step-kids have a bio mother to do this stuff with and/or for them?

    Mary – And here we are thinking the 50s were such a fun, innocent, Happy Days, time. Interesting that although you’re probably the oldest commenter here, you’re the only other one so far who said they’d be okay with the sleepover under certain conditions. Although I was thinking more in terms of the high school teenager and her boyfriend/girlfriend sleeping over.

    Tom – I hope things improved over time?

    Linsey – You can vote for anything you want here. I would be interested in hearing that story, though — perhaps tomorrow’s blog post??

    Dr. Monkey – No, I don’t really hate to think of her becoming sexually active. I just hope it happens when she’s really ready. She seems pretty sensible about it so far, but one never knows what could happen in the throes of passion. We have talked about it from every conceivable angle and continue to do so, so I hope that helps. (PS: I hope you’ve given up that filthy self-abuse habit by now and are restricting yourself to nice, married, heterosexual Christian intercourse without any of that weird stuff boys sometimes get into their heads from reading those nasty magazines)

  9. There’s no vote for no romance but a damn good time because the guy really knew what he was doing. The problem with a kick ass one night stand first time is that chances are several times after with less experienced guys will be Meh! at best…

  10. Meh – I was 17 and felt I just needed to do it already seeing as how I was pretty much the last of ALL of my friends (even the much younger ones) to do it.
    And I was really lucky because I talked to my mother about all this stuff before it happened, as it happened, etc. At least I felt really strongly about being safe (or relatively) and always counseled my friends on the use of birth control and would go and ask my mother questions about other people’s issues because they had nobody to ask.
    I’m pretty sure my mother was actually relieved when I stopped talking to her about it all though – so good on her to have been willing to talk about it without getting angry or trying to get me to stop, because that really isn’t ever the way to get through to a teenager.
    I’m not looking forward to this stage with my kids, but hopefully it’ll be in more like 18+ than 13 years 😉

  11. Without getting into details, it was hit & miss for a long time, then a big hit for ten years, and now, sadly, nothing. But I keep my hopes up.

  12. Not being a parent myself, I am absolutely qualified to give advice on parenting (just as most soccer coaches can’t play soccer themselves but are qualified to train soccer players!).

    Anyway, my advice is to tell the kids what is right and to give them the self esteem to stand firm against peer pressure. Hope for the best but be prepared for the worst and be ready to pick up the pieces.

    I salute you parents! tough gig.

  13. I’m with Nat…I’m coming to you for advice when we reach that point. As it is, I think the Captain is getting very close to requiring the birds and bees talk, and I’m dreading it. Eep.

    As for first times, I will actually go YA. The sex was terrible, of course, we had no idea what we were doing, but the guy really cared for me and was very respectful and did his best to make it a romantic evening. We were together for almost a year and it was a real thing, so I’ve never regretted it.

  14. Jazz – I think that would be a YA, even if there was no romance. Experience and technique often trump fumbling love.

    GTM – Your mom sounds great — a lot like me (ha ha). I’ve passed on a lot of info via the girlchild to her friends over the years and to the friends directly as well. I’m always amazed at how many kids don’t think their parents would understand or would talk to them about stuff. I always encourage them to try to talk to them anyway. Anyway, the great thing about kids growing up is that they do it in stages, so that you’re pretty much prepared. For instance when your kids are 3 or 4 you can’t imagine ever thinking about them having sex, or driving a car or going abroad alone for a month or having a job and moving out, but as time goes on you slowly get used to the idea and you’re usually ready when they are.

    Tom – Um…it’s not your hopes that need to be up…

    Ellie – We just do what needs to be done, I guess. Like I said to GTM, it’s not something you can grasp or imagine all at once, it’s a day-by-day kind of thing like most journeys.

  15. LGS – Sometimes an outsiders perspective is very useful, although I don’t know how you can coach soccer if you never play it? Isn’t that kind of like cooking if you never eat?

    Lynn- Ah, so YA but still ARG. Let your husband give the Captain his talk – you do the girls. I think it’s easier that way. They’ll forget most of what you tell them anyway and you’ll have to keep repeating stuff year after year after year. Let the kids lead the discussion because they don’t really want to know everything all at once. Ask him/her what he/she knows, if she has any questions, have a child appropriate book on hand which you can read and look at together

  16. xup, great post. i am of absolutely no use to you as far as when things get easy. this topic scares me to death, it really does.

  17. MEH… no biggy…

    My 16 year old daughter is OF COURSE NEVER gonna have sex until she’s 30!

    Yeah, right.

    I go by the “don’t be an ostrich” philosophy and stay open and communicative. My folks were with all of their 4 spawns and I think it worked well. Growing up on a small farm helps. My whole family still laughs hysterically when my Dad tells the story of how my little brother asking – upon seeing one of the horses mounting the other – “But Daddy, don’t you hurt Mommy’s back when you do that?”

    Sex is (sigh) a part of growing up and, while all of the appropriate warnings must be seriously put out there, ya might as well accept that it will happen sooner than you would prefer, with someone you don’t particularly like and in circumstances that aren’t ideal.

    And XUP, you know darned well that parenthood only gets easy when you die. No recesses allowed!

  18. Oh, MEH all the way. I remember coming home and writing in my diary “Well, it’s gone” (my virginity). I also remember telling the boy that if he didn’t call me, I’d kill him. He never called again, but I didn’t kill him. Just gave him the stink-eye and dated his friend. I was 16, by the way, so some of this immaturity is justified.

  19. Meh with a lot of aargh and I was fifteen so bonus points for gaah(not being ready).
    You were teh best reader at BOLO in my humble opinion. You kicked my silly love story ass.

  20. Dad always told me to let him know and he would take me to get on the pill, but you really don’t want to just tell them so we used condoms until Dad brought it up himself. BF didn’t stay over when Dad was home, but when Dad went out of town, Dad would ask boyfriend to stay over with me. Knowing how “when the time came” I wasn’t up to making an announcement, I sort of watched for signs with my daughter and showed up in her room one evening with a GIANT box of condoms and said, “Look I realize you may not want to discuss this with me right now, but here are these and if you feel tempted to go for it, use these. And if you run out and are too shy to buy more, I’ll buy you more.” As for my first time, it was great and to this day that BF rates at the top of the list for style.

  21. Raino – Yo! Where have you been? You’re not blogging, you’re not commenting, you didn’t come to BOLO!! Whaddup woman? I hope everything is okay and you’re just too busy or somerthing?? Anyway, nice to hear from you again. This topic might be scary now since your kiddies are still young, but trust me, you will evolve into the mother of a teenager around about the same time as the kid(s) become teenagers. It’s a miracle of nature.

    Trashee – 30?? She might not want to wait that long. By then it will just be too weird. 20 maybe? Nice compromise. But I agree with everything else you said. Lucky you to have a practice child and lots of time between the others so you can review and assess everything you did and didn’t do and have your Best Practices in place as the others come up.

    Meagan – Well, I lived with my first one for 3 years, and in the end I still wanted to kill him, so .. one-night stand/long term relationship — it’s all ends up the same anyway.

    Elaine – Why? Were you drunk? Were you in love? Did one or both of you not know what you were doing? Was it a one-nighter or a long-termer? I need details (not too many though)

    Lala – Thank you very much, but I don’t think there was a “best”; I think every one of the readers was great in their own way. Every one was so different — your love story was loverly and funny and so sad at the end when we all found out that this guy didn’t turn out to be your husband. (Does husband know about this guy? Does he care that he can’t live up to this wonderful weekend? And what do you supposed would have happened if you’d stayed with the weekend guy long term?)

    Geewits – Your Dad, eh? I can’t imagine my Dad ever having a talk like that with me. What about your mom?? It’s nice to hear that someone’s first time was great. I wonder if it has something to do with the fact that you had a caring parent who you could talk to about it and make you feel comfortable about it. Or maybe it was just the BF and his awesome technique??

  22. Dang I am so glad I don’t have a 16 year old daughter because I don’t know how long I could keep her locked up in her room…I suppose their is some illegality for that even in Canada.

    Children should go from being 4 for like 12 years and then to being 25 graduated from college with a good career and cut out all that crap in between….

  23. When my daughters were young, I did not give permission for sleep overs, I just knocked on the youngest daughter’s door one morning and found out she was having one. Luckily, she was up and he was sort-of sleeping and it wasn’t too horribly embarrasing.

    I am now raising the child who was a result of that (sic) relationship. He is rather shy, very intelligent and not real social. He is, to be honest, a gaming nerd. Girls were not an issue in high school and his one college girlfriend, who is now his fiance, has spent the summer here and is wonderful.

    His brother, the middle guy, has had umpteen X’s eleven to die for, serious, wanna marry girlfriends since he came to live with me at sixteen. This includes the one he was already having a long distance, gonna marry, relationship with. The most we could do was make sure he has protection and remind him of the consequences of not using it. There have been, I believe, two girls spend the night. I am not thrilled but at least he is home safe and not doing it in the back of a car by the side of the railroad track, like I did as a teen. That is a big plus for me. On the other side, the second one became his stalker and that has slowed him down, so some good came of it.

    I’m still trying to get used to guys spending the night at each other’s homes. (I am presuming purely platonic). No guys would have done that when I was young. Although, typical double standard, girls could do it.

    As far as the parenting gig getting easy. Forget it. It never does. My youngest daughter, was still giving me trouble, agony and causing me tears when she was almost forty.

    Just think, XUP, they ALWAYS move back home.

  24. Oh, and YA definitely. We waited a year, even in the sixties, and then we married. Had seven pretty good years, one fantastic daughter, who was rebellious as all get out and had sleepovers during the day, I found out when I came home early from work, and then there is younger daughter. And, their dad and I can still be friends.

  25. I really loved this post, but don’t have too much to add except for this little tidbit:

    My husband’s Dad had a rule that his children (who were all sons) could have a girl to sleep-over at anytime, provided that they stay for breakfast with the family in the morning.

    How good is that?!

  26. Elaine – You ARE a good girl.

    Cedar – All the in between stuff is important for the parents, too. Kind of like funerals are important for the bereaved — helps them get used to the idea. It would be quite a shock to have a 4-year-old one day and a 25-year-old the next

    Sheryl – The interesting thing about teen love is that it’s so intense. We can mock and ridicule it and forbid it and poo-poo it, but in fact, these are some of the most passionate relationships a person is ever likely to have. I think teen love needs to be taken a lot more seriously than it has been. I think it informs your relationships for the rest of your life in some ways. My kiddie “seems” to be fairly level headed. I say that in quotation marks because I know there are things that go on in her life that I don’t know about — even though she seems to tell me a lot. As it should be.

    Julie – Ya, I’d like to get to know anyone my child is close to as well. Breakfast is an excellent time to do this. Very cool.

  27. Xup,
    My parents were divorced and I lived with Dad. I didn’t see much of Mom until I got my driver’s license and then we were just hanging out and having drinks together.

  28. arg, and ouch, if i may add that.

    i feel lucky that my parents really taught me about self-respect. the only problem was that some boys didn’t really respect the fact that i respected myself….does that make sense?
    your post makes me really sad. these poor girls who allow themselves to be treated that way, and their “friends” who watch from the sidelines. i would never have let a friend be treated that way.
    and who are these boys who have so little respect for their peers?
    i’m feeling a little naive.

  29. Well, not really. It was with a woman 18 years my senior in a motel on El Camino Real. I lay there thinking “So *that’s* what it feels like.”

    Like I said Meh.

  30. Meh here too. I’m one of the rare ones who waited until she was married. I’m so glad my children are grown. The world seems flooded with sex in movies, TV, and MTV. I guess it sort of started with the movie Animal House. And then there is the whole drug scene. So scary out there.

  31. But my hopes stem from my brain, my most relevant sex organ. Right?

    As for keeping anything else up, never an issue. Knock on wood.

  32. I asked my mom once why she never told me anything about sex, and she replied rather stiffly that she told me as much as she knew when she got MARRIED (zilch).

    Agh and Meh; Not memorable except for first time, but rather forced by a longish time same high school boyfriend, so arg. He turned out to have stalker tendencies, periodically surfacing in a negative fashion throughout later years (it’s been 37 years!). I sometimes wonder if he wonders why I don’t want to be his Facebook friend? And no, I didn’t block him directly. I’m rather easy to find for someone who sells real estate and don’t need the potential hassle.

  33. of course there is no best, but you were very good!
    my husband knows about him and lived in his shadow for a long time. That guy left for Hong Kong and I would have joined him but he got cold feet. C’est la vie.

  34. Yes, they have a bio mother, but I have better parental instincts than her… so you know how bad *she* is. She buys the girls (12 and 13) thong underwear, tarty clothes, and whole smacks of make-up, and allows them free, unsupervised access to the Internet. I don’t trust her to make smart decisions for herself, let alone those girls. This one’s on me.

  35. Geewits – Ah! Well good on your Dad for stepping up and being a mensch.

    Meanie – Yes! Ouch! Ha ha. No one’s mentioned that so far. It IS very sad what these girls are doing to themselves and what the boys are doing to themselves and their female peers. Our sisters from the 60s who fought valiantly for equal rights must be tearing their hair out.

    Elaine – How exotic – El Camino Real…wasn’t that a Bogie movie or something?

    Linda –Well, I certainly hope things moved beyond Meh. I probably would have waited until I got married, too, except I decided I wasn’t ever going to get married. And I didn’t. Which would have meant waiting a really long time. I wasn’t that patient. I don’t think we can blame a movie. I think the 1960s and the Pill revolutionized sexual behaviour. Then AIDS, I think really threw a monkey wrench into the works. Kids today are really confused about sex. It’s supposed to be fun and romantic, but it can kill you and/or give you all sorts of horrible diseases.

    Tom – Yes. The Brain. #1 sex organ. (Knock wood – heh, heh, heh)

    Becky – Silly mom. You’d think having experienced all that ignorance she would have wanted better for her daughter? And, “forced” you say?? This guy sounds like bad news. Stupid high school boyfriends.

    Lala – Well, if he’s “that” kind of guy it probably wouldn’t have gone anywhere anyway. I assume since you got married that you appreciate the sterling qualities your husband possesses instead of pining for what might have been? If hot-romantic-weekend-guy was all you hold in your memory of him, he’d be by your side now. The guy by your side is the important one. Hot-romantic-weekend-guy served his purpose. (Trust me, I know whereof I speak).

    Susan – Look at you coming over all maternal. All that crusty exterior stuff. All that talk of disliking the step-kids…Here you are all mothery. Why not just go all the way and let yourself fall in love with them?

  36. Hey now. There’s no need to go that far!

    Is it maternal to want children to learn all the important life-lessons and to turn out as decent human beings, or just… human? I want them to suffer as little as possible in life, and to me, that means teaching them the lessons now and not forcing them to do everything the hard way.

    I don’t love them, and most days I don’t even like them, but I am *obligated* to them by the role I accepted when I married their father.

    I’m scared of what might happen if I let myself love them. Do I even have that capacity?

  37. holy shit. this is a box o’ worms that i’m not happy about. sadly, our daughter has mixed sleepovers at her mother’s house and it’s kept secret from the other kids’ parents. this really makes me sad b/c she’s gotten mixed messages like this for all of her life.

    i think sometimes parents actually set their kids up to make the same mistakes they did without knowing it, and especially if they haven’t learned the “lesson”.

    i can honestly say that my history protected me from wanting to do ANYTHING that involved seeing a naked person. most of my friends were all “doing it” but i was terrified. the downside was that i had to do a LOT of work in that area in order to come to terms with the enjoyment of the actual practice of lovemaking.

    i think i’ve said too much.

    i strongly believe that if you’ve done your best in raising your child (not you specifically) you have to trust they will make the best decisions for themselves. as well, you have to give them the opportunity to make mistakes so they can learn how to correct or move on from the mistakes. kind of like learning to walk but with much higher stakes each year they get older.

    hot topic here xup.

    oh and definitely ARG times a hundred.

  38. Susan – I think you probably already do love them, but don’t want to label it as such. Don’t sweat it. If you do, you do and if you don’t you don’t

    Leah – Gee. How awful for you. I’m glad it seems to have all worked out in the end. And the daughter, I think will be fine. She sounds like a smart girl and she’ll figure out which path will be better to take.

  39. The more I hear about what everybody has to worry about with kids, the more I’m confident I’d be permanently attached to an IV if I had some. I can’t even watch my dogs in pain. I think I might be one of those parents that they lock up in a looney bin and then the kid writes that bestseller telling about it.

    “It’s no big deal,” the girls say shrugging, while watching wistfully as the guy they’ve just serviced saunters off with his arm around the “real” girlfriend (Who, I understand, often watches and laughs). ARE YOU KIDDING ME?!!!! I might have to have an IV just from reading about other people’s kids.

    and semi-argh. Teenage boys are so dumb.

    (teenage girls are rocket scientists.)

  40. Teenage girls ARE rocket scientists! They get way-layed by pleasing the boys too early in life and focusing in on his pleasure over their own.

  41. LoLa – Teenagers are mentally defective in many ways, but clever in others. Just like real people.

    Lauren – I agree. They never seem to let go of that either.

    Tim- Thanks for dropping by and reading this really old post and leaving a comment for the first time and pointing out an error. I have no answer for you except that I guess I’m retarded when it comes to recognizing rodent species.

  42. your “muscrat” picture is not muscrats. They are woodchucks or prarie dogs in the pic.
    Please correct it so you don’t confuse the kids.