Things We Need To Wonder About Today

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Obama. Dude… you know, it sounds like you’re mostly doing okay so far, but you really have to work on your gift giving skills, man. You gave The Queen of England an iPod loaded with a mix of Broadway show tunes and videos of her visit to the US in 2007? WTF? I’m shaking my head, I really am. That would have been cute for your high school sweetheart, but The Queen?  And this is after giving British Prime Minister, Gordon Brown a box of your favourite DVDs?

The Conficker Worm. Waddup? Do I rush out and sell my PC like some people are doing? Do I hire a team of security experts to clean out my system or do I just assume it’s a hoax. Has anything happened to anyone’s computer yet?  PC guru, David Coursey says:

The Conficker Worm is like the Paris Hilton of computer security: Famous solely for being famous. Neither has actually ever done anything of note. But, at least Paris has a sense of humor about her celebrity. Conficker just wastes people’s time.

Miss Universe – Dayana Mendoza just came back from a visit to Guantanamo Bay. She said, “It was a loooooot of fun!” And then goes on to describe how rides around the camp encircled with barbed wire, minefields and watchtowers were “relaxing, peaceful, and beautiful”.

We visited the Detainees camps and we saw the jails, where they shower, how they recreate themselves with movies, classes of art, books. It was very interesting.

Mayor Larry. He must be on the same kind of meds as Miss Universe. What else would prompt him to announce his intention to run again in 2010?  He says:

Certainly I’d vote for myself. I’m not satisfied with the way the City of Ottawa is running. For me to make any truly long-term changes for the benefit of the city, council and I have to find a way to make it run more effectively.

Oh man, that’s funny, funny stuff. Seriously, I almost peed myself. The man’s a natural comedian. I hope you’re out of jail in time for the elections, Larry, so we can all not vote for you.

Stephen HarperOoops! He missed the G-20 group photo by this <  > much. They waited for a while, but when he didn’t show up, took the picture without him. I’m thinking he was having trouble with his fly.

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No, of course this isn’t Prime Minister Stephen Harper, but this guy having trouble with his fly vs any photo of Harper???

And speaking of pants. Why do the store signs say, “Pant Sale”?  First of all, why are pants plural anyway? Why are they “a pair of pants.” It’s only one item. But, okay, if we’ve decided each leg counts as one thing then fine, they’re a pair. So why then, when a bunch of them are on sale, do they become singular?

PS to Matt, whoever you are – stop spamming me with everything under the sun. I’m glad you think my blog is “great”, but I’m still going to delete your comments.

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32 responses to “Things We Need To Wonder About Today

  1. Rasputin’s schlong to buff guy’s dark inviting patch. Your blog is entirely too stimulating for me these last couple of days. 🙂

  2. …oh, and let’s not forget about polygamy. You’ve kept the conversation in my house very interesting indeed this week.

  3. Dayana proving why she didn’t win the “Miss High IQ” contest. As for Mayor Larry, I think he’s been taking cues from Sarah Palin. Give it up already please! You have no place in politics!

  4. Aggie – Wise decision. If it doesn’t appear on my blog, it’s not important anyway.

    Susan – What about the toast? The toast inspired the liveliest discussion this blog has seen for some time.

    Bandobras – What about the toast? The toast inspired the most disturbing discussion this blog has seen for some time.

    Hannah – Larry is a barrel of laughs isn’t he? He’s “not satisfied with the way Ottawa is running” Ha ha – HELLO!! Neither are we. Well, it’s good to know he’s willing to vote for himself anyway

  5. Larry is something out of a cartoon. And I wish he would go back there.
    What an, um, luscious photo.
    And you know what, I bet the Queen just loves the Ipod. That’s a hugely funny illustration, too.

  6. i thought obama’s gift to the queen was awesome!
    i’d love to see a slideshow of random shots of me set to broadway tunes, c’mon, wouldn’t we all????
    actually, she might have also liked the picture you posted today for our viewing pleasure…..

  7. The only thing mayorlarry has going for him is his hair style.
    However, I almost had a stroke when just for a moment, I got this “flash” of Harpie with his pants partially descending. I mean, XUP, you can’t do that to your loyal readers who may have some issues with picturing Steve partially naked!
    Argh! Blood pressure skyrocketing!
    Oh, and your post of the past week was undoubtedly the one about Spam on toast. My latest scribble is partially in homage of that discussion.
    Someone should call Colbert about you!

  8. Mary G – I hope somebody good runs for mayor next time. And yes, he is rather like a cartoon. I don’t see the Queen as an iPod kind of gal.

    Meanie – Did you really? It’s one of those gifts that people give because they’d like it and so think everybody would like it. Like my mum giving me cardigans from Northern Reflections with appliquéd moose on them.

    Trashee – Again with the Spam?? I never did a post about Spam. I did a post about toast. YOU brought up the Spam (literally and figuratively). Thanks for the homage and sorry about the stroke.

    Kitty – If you like this photo, you’ll love the blog I swiped him from: http://begging4attention.blogspot.com He has a regular “Tonight’s Shirtlessness” feature. (PS: Nice to see you up and about again)

  9. Alan Bennett wrote a hilarious book about how the Queen discovered reading books (The Reader), and how she’d be cutting short meetings and disappearing or falling asleep at state functions due to her new-found obsession with reading. I was thinking when I saw what Obama gave her that perhaps we should watch for the tell-tale earbuds when she’s on her walk-abouts and see if she starts dancing in the streets and bumping into her security guys.

  10. “Like, um, Liz, I think you’re really neat ‘n’ stuff, and don’t care about the age difference, or, like, the height difference. I, like wanted to make you a mixed DVD of, like, our favourite songs, but, like, you’re too special for that, so, like, I got you an iPod. Oh, darn, my voice just cracked again.”

  11. that picutre of the nice man worried about his pants falling down…it made my day. Ill probably be back to look at it again later. Its a beautiufl thing.
    xoxo
    delaina

  12. Hey Obama was probably just trying to be nice.
    Let’s face it it’s not like she needs anything, so I’m sure he just thought of some nice made in America trinket for her.

  13. Violetsky – I think it’s been scientifically proven that readers don’t cotton to iPods.

    Bob – I would love to have been there after Obama left and Liz was having drinks with the family later talking about her visit with the new Prez.

    DeLaina – Thanks for stopping by. I’m so glad something about my blog has drawn you here and delighted you!

    Bandobras – The Queen gives out silver picture frames to all visiting dignitaries. That’s a gift that can’t miss. Broadway show tunes? Perhaps he’s mixing up his queens.

  14. I thought the Larry thing was a April Fools joke. I don’t know that’s just what I thought.

    What do you give the Queen of England? I thought it was hysterical.

    As for Harper… I am still trouble that he was only “very troubled” about the anti-women legislation in Afganistan.

  15. I thought the Ipod gift was a little strange, but the Queen’s gift of a picture herself and Prince Phillip…well that was just a tad narcisstic don’t you think?

  16. I thought Obama’s gift was cool. I’m sure they did research to find out what music she liked and it’s sort of like he’s saying, “Hey strange lady who lives in a forgotten time: It’s the 21st Century and you will not be getting a gilded Faberge egg from us.” Damn, my trouser just caught on the edge of the desk. Silly trouser.

  17. I actually thought the iPod gift was great. I’m with geewits – I’m sure they researched it – and I’m willing to hazard a guess she might’ve been totally intrigued by it. As a matter of fact all this ceremony surrounding meeting the Queen is not even going to matter one iota anymore because no one will EVER be able to meet with the Queen again. Because she’s going to be way too busy watching her iPod. Go Queenie!

  18. If you wanna post a picture of a six-pack dude with his crotch half-showing, whatever…I don’t care.

    Just that I hope all you ladies remember this, the next time you want to rant about women being objectified in the media, and being presented idealized, unrealistic body images. 🙂

  19. Nat – Ya, I was going to mention that “very troubled” thing. Maybe that’s as PO’d as he’s allowed to get in public

    Jazz – Yes, I have, Jazz. Very rippley.

    Cedar – The gift is the silver frame. The photo is just one of those printed on photocopy paper like the ones you get at the store with happy smiling families in blue sweaters in the frames. (PS: You’re the only one who didn’t mention the guy with his pants half down)

    Geewits – Trouser. Jean.Slack. Anything related to pants. I can’t see that iPod being very well researched. They wouldn’t have made such a big deal about it in the media if it was a protocol sort of gift. There must be a standard gift for foreign dignitaries that the US has. Every government has crap like that on hand. Really, I think this was a total Obama thing.

    Gurlnextdoor – Great!! Keep reading and commenting. Why is there no link here to your blog? Do you have one? I’d like to read it if you do.

    Lesley – See my note to Geewits. A loaded iPod is only a good gift for someone you know really well personally. I’m sure the Queen knows what an iPod is and could have a million of them if she wanted to.She’ll probably give this one to some poor kid.

    Friar – Touche. I am very bad. Bad. Bad. You’re very right. Women should not be thinking of men as sexual objects or even as sexual beings. They should only be thought of in the context of intelligent, feeling human beings with whom we can converse about important world events. And sometimes Vikings.

  20. next time, pls, a warning not to scroll down for those who don’t want to see such pics!
    Love the ipod & pants discussions though.
    Take care.

  21. don’t ever put a warning to not scroll down…it’s one of the things I love about your blog. You just never know what’s further down the page! There was a discussion about ipods and pants????

  22. Hoda – It’s a man’s naked chest!? I’ve seen guys, and especially women walking around town in the summer dressed more revealingly and provocatively than this. I guess if you were a regular here you’d come to expect things like this now and then.

    Bonnie – Ha ha. I know. It was some tough work trying to come up with a blog post that would somehow lead into this photo.

    Friar – Maybe she was being pretend-shocked..you know, to be funny??

  23. clearly that fella needs assistance with his fly. please provide the location for that tree. will be right over!

  24. a) Obama – yeah, that reminded me of mixed tapes, in a way. But in a cute way. Then again, he can’t do wrong in my book.

    b) Conficker. Well, most probably that one (or another really aggressive cousin) toook out my computer, so I am a taaaaaad touchy when it comes to virusses right now.

    c) Miss Universe – yup, that cracked me up. Reminded me of Nazi Germany, filmstars visiting the camps and being impressed about the cleanliness…

    d) Half-naked guy – you know, it’s nice to look at and all, but personally, I need something softer in bed.

    e) You missed my personal topic of the week, but then again, I am probably late with it, living in Germany and all… The Fast & the Furious 4. Like, the whole original cast? Vin Diesel? I cannot wait for that one…

  25. Raino – I think you may have the wrong set of hormones for this fellow considering the source of this photo, but you can still look.

    Gila – What about Obama’s “special olympics” crack? That was so not cool. Fast & Furious?…not my cup of tea. I’ll wait for you to blog about it.

  26. oh, that queen with the ipod pic is precious. and as for the worm…something happened to M’s computer but we shut it down before whatever happened had managed to infect everything, and it’s been working okay since, so I think we saved it. otherwise, nothing…