Back when I was young and very foolish, I bought a car. I’d never owned a car before, wasn’t looking for a car and had no intention of buying a car. However, somewhere I came across this cute little ancient Austin 1100 – I can’t even remember where – and they were selling it for only $200.
I have no explanation except that I must have fallen so completely in love with it that I’d lost my mind. It looked just like this:
Isn’t it adorable? So teensy tiny, I felt like I could just pick it up and tuck it in amongst the stuffed animals on my bed…..if I’d had stuffed animals on my bed, which I didn’t….. and never have had, even when I was a kid. Because I don’t like stuffed animals. I think they’re creepy and collect dust. I never bought my daughter a stuffed animal either…. ever…. though I let her keep one or two that she got as gifts….
Anyway, this car was just a bit bigger than a mini. It was a 4-speed automatic and surprisingly roomy inside (roomy enough for car sex if I’d been that way inclined) and had leather seats. I knew nothing about cars and consulted no one about the purchase — just paid cash and drove it home.
Of course it was a disaster. There were so many things wrong with it, that I barely ever got to drive it.
Which was probably a good thing since I didn’t have a license – not even a learner’s permit.
I was reminded of this extraordinarily ridiculous purchase the other day when I read Anne Hines’ column about the “stupidest thing she ever bought”. Her stupidest thing she ever bought was a birdbath heater. Some of her readers said the stupidest things they ever bought were:
- A marriage license;
- A book about the Grapefruit Diet, followed closely by 20 pounds of grapefruit;
- A gadget called the Tile Titan which was supposed to steam scum off her bathroom tiles and ended up steaming all the labels off her bathroom products and the wallpaper off her bathroom walls, but left the scum intact; and,
- One woman said the stupidest thing she ever bought was her ex-boyfriend’s story about where he spent every Friday night.
In this season, the season of stupid purchases, what’s the stupidest thing you ever bought?